Expanding heart

Being with Paul 2 days ago all day was very satisfying and then receiving Nina's confidant email the next morning really enlivened me for the entire day. I was quite happy to go about my business in Danbury having been uplifted. I think because I feel a real connection to their lives (of course my reply to Nina might've put her off, but I don't know.) I felt full all day, connecting fully with various people, feeling like my laser eyes would burn into whatever I'd seen. Landlording was fun even.

Tonight saw the documentary on Morgan Feeman's offer to buy one prom for this poor southern town's high school. I was very emotional throughout. I feel deep inside something is brewing within me. I had the urge to take Shana for ice cream or something. Sort of overturns but nothing done. Been thinking how it's pretty normal for m and d and gary and me to stay out of each other's lives. Not like the Picows.

Something brewing, I dunno, having a child, having an effect on the community. I want to give money but also be involved with all sorts of people--races, ages---doing something that they are thrilled at. (Like putting together that prom---the kids were doing it up and it was a first time for most so their boundries are being challenged.) I would like to see what the need is and try to fill it by creating something out of thin air. I've seen some good ideas in the past. Dr. Laura's bit about morals and values may have some merit. My chest if full yet I still work on the pool and cut the grass and still not really reaching out. Though yesterday I spoke with Ian, Felicia, Michael, left message for Ping, and Gary and it was all excellent. I guess I need lots of warm socializing which I had last week.